Archive for the ‘I Love Paper’ Category

I Love Paper (3)

February 5, 2008

I love paper, mainly because of the written word. Long pieces, short articles, just playing around with language. Which you can do online, on tv or on radio. But on paper, it’s just… art.

Ernest Hemingway won his ten dollar bet that he could write a life story is six words by coming up with:

For sale, baby shoes. Never worn.

Shiver down my spine, when I heard it for the umpteenth time on BBC’s Today this morning. Someone had started a similar contest. Come up with your own. Been done before, here in England and of course in Hemingway’s America.

It is fun, and I’m always looking for these kind of sentences in news paper articles. Which is why I love paper. What paper? Well pick your own, based on how Jim Hacker in Yes Minister put it: Don’t tell me about the press. I know exactly who reads the papers:

* The Daily Mirror is read by people who think they run the country;

* The Guardian is read by people who think they ought to run the country;

* The Times is read by people who actually do run the country;

* The Daily Mail is read by the wives of the people who run the country;

* The Financial Times is read by people who own the country;

* The Morning Star is read by people who think the country ought to be run by another country;

* And the Daily Telegraph is read by people who think it is.

Sir Humphrey: Prime Minister, what about the people who read the Sun?

Bernard Woolley: Sun readers don’t care who runs the country, as long as she’s got big tits.

(Alert reader Bram sent these quotes by way of my NOS blog. Thanks.)


I Love Paper (2)

December 16, 2007

You may call me ‘weirdo’, I don’t care. I still love paper, as professed in an earlier entry. So here the love story continues.

6. I love all those people who actually read the paper on the bus, whether it’s Metro, London Lite or some other daily rag.

7. But I also love to smile politely and say ‘no thanks’ to the insisting paper boys handing out those freebies.

8. I therefore love handing over 50 pence for The Evening Standard to the old lady at Marylebone Station.

9. I love doing recycling, and more often than not I end up reading another page before it’s all tossed in that huge, green container.

10. I love Letters to the Editor, especially those in The Daily Telegraph. These folks must still use an old fashioned type writer. Love it!

I Love Great Headlines

I Love Paper (1)

November 22, 2007

Sure, having the news delivered to you on your mobile, on your blackberry or relayed to that implanted chip behind your left ear is the future, and there’s no denying of that fact.

But my sun only rises when the papers arrive on the doormat. A (to be continued) ode to printed joy. Leave your love letters in the comments below.

What's on your doormat?

1. I love the blackened fingers. Scars of a devoted reader willing to suffer.

2. I love that moment on Sunday evening when I’ve really finished off that tree, top to bottom.

3. I love the grateful nod of a fellow train passenger when he picks up my paper, carefully left behind.

4. I love it when my boys start flipping through the comics. Nostalgia for the next generation.

5. I love losing time on the loo, cos’ I gotta finish that great piece in G2.